When I was young, I used to think I was a liberal. And I was told that the Democrats were the liberals. And so I thought I was a Democrat.

But the Democrats turned out to be illiberal. And so I thought maybe I was a conservative. And the conservatives were the Rebuplicans, and they were trying to conserve the liberalism I believed in.

But the Republicans turned out to be only conserving the illiberalism of the Democrats. And so I thought maybe I was a libertarian. The Libertarians are supposed to believe in the liberty of the individual above all else, and to oppose unnecessary state intervention. That seemed like a pretty liberal position that jived with my values.

But the Libertarians turned out to be opportunists, opposing when opposition was cool and fringy, but unifying and bonding with whoever was in power when they found themselves in need of validation. The Libertarians did not stand for their values. In fact, their values turned out to be more fluid and difficult to pin down than any.

So then I thought maybe I was an anarchist. And the anarchists told me to go f*ck myself; that no one was going to save me from the ever-expanding State.

And I knew I was home.